Feelings. Have some. It’s healthy.

Lemme tell you beautiful people something. If you never read another thing of mine, read this, I’m fairly positive that this is the most worthwhile piece of…you know, whatever, that I have to say. Ready…deep breath…

It’s ok to have feelings…ok…Imma say it oooonnee moorree tiiiimmee, you know, just in case that shit didn’t quite resonate with ya.

IT”S O’FUCKING-KAY TO HAVE MUTHAFUCKIN” FEELINGS…(I feel like that was a clan in the early highlands; clan O’Fucking [as I try not to laugh hysterically in the middle of a crowded coffee shop…I kinda feel like I look like I’m have an asthma attack..no one panic])
Feelings, experience that shit. It’s not good to keep it bottled up. It’s not.

Now stay with me, I’m about to change gears ready? (eerrrrttt)
Women, man, aren’t they fantastic?

Ok, here’s the deal, the Offended Straight White Guy is a bit pissed at his own half of the species and the pissed-off-ed-ness in question is growing…and growing…and it grows every fuckin’ time I hear some douche put down women, one way or another. Or not recognize a woman the way she deserves respect. There’s too much of it man, too many mutherfuckas tryin’ to “play the game” too many muthafuckas see women as less than they are. The only thing I can think to do is stand up against the muther.fuckers who think cat-calling is ok
Who think being openly creepy is ok
Who think degrading the beautiful half of the species is ok.

Fuck, dude. It’s not ok. None of any of this creepy shit is ok. None of the stoooooopid shit that stupid dudes do with/for/against/in-spite-of/in-reference-to/ with-the-best-intentions (kindly fuck yourself in the face) /towards women is ok. It’s not. It hasn’t been, and the men who think any of it is (“well you gotta admit…” NO SHUT THE FUCK UP AND SIDDOWN, I have the microphone,  and YOU WILL LISTEN TO EVERY DAMN WORD I HAVE TO SAY)
ya, they’re not ok either.

There really isn’t too much more to say on the subject without getting deep into details. I don’t do details. Also I’m trying not to take anything TOO seriously, but men being shitty to women is something I do not tolerate lightly. and it might be that EVERYONE is more fuckin’ involved with EVERYTHING and EVERYONE ELSE”S SHIT because we’re all a apart of the internet and we’re all fuckin connected now and all involved with each other n shit and the shit that other people are passionate about (politics for most of my older relatives, baseball for some of the dudes I went to college with, American football for others…all of which I give NOT A SINGLE FUCK about [go forth and lay thine eyes on my field of fucks, lo beholdeth! it is barren])

{Allow me to insert here a moderately related incident that has kinda sorta maybe something to do with what I’m gettin’ at that only just occurred yesterevening (which was a word during the Stalin regime, I believe).
I dunno how many of you saw, but for those who didn’t, the existence of my social life can be culminated through TWO sentiments 1)”Eh, I’m not missing any thing and 2) oh! well, I’ll just do both! Because sometimes I wanna do all the things. duh. Anyways, this past yesterevening (I’m liking it more and more) I attended two functions, one on top of/right after the other. I went to go see my buddy’s band play, (Brock, awesome work mate) and I went to my roommate’s birthday party.
Local music I LOVE, pretty much anything, anytime. I love going and listening to the either awesome or fuckin’ terrible shit that people create (Can’t be mad, it’s creative). AFTER aforementioned local musical soiree, I made the decision to attend a birthday party. Which was being held at a place that is totally not my style around people with whom I cannot relate. Fuckin’ clubs.
Now, I’m a dive bar, tiki lounge, karaoke night kinda guy…waiting in a line framed by vomit and cigarette smoke, to cram myself in a place boasting a guy to girl ratio of about 14 to 1, filled with bad perfume, and worse cologne, to buy 7 dollar bottles of Pacifico and witness people trying too hard to gyrate on each other calling it ‘dancing’ while they look more like a VERY bad amateur porn shot on a flip-phone camera from ’01…is not my bag.

To make matters worse, I witness (WITNESS) one of the bros in our group drunkenly smack the ass of a girl NOT in our group in front of my face. IN FRONT OF MY FACE.
Now, I’ve been on a feminist good one and I’m currently pissed off at the collective behavior of my side of the species (men, I’m talking about males). AND THIS MUTHERFUCKER pulls this shit. And you wonder why women are so wary? I don’t, not anymore. So I looked at him and said, “Yo, do you know her?” to which he shook his head. I asked her “Do you know him?” to which she shook her head. At which I scold the bro and as if I were disciplining a puppy for peeing on the rug, tell him to go away.
He got kicked out for being an asshole, cuz bouncers can do that, (not sarcastic) and we all left. That’s my story} Now for a segway that would make more sense if I wasn’t suddenly inspired to write that.
in short, very large piece of my personal, internal pie chart wishes that the internet was not a thing…but then again, how would I be able to vomit the shit in my mind on this page and post it where everyone can see it whether they choose to or not?…oh, fuck, did I actually make a point?…or like, intentionally, ironically contradict myself?  were you paying attention? you can go back…I’ll wait……

Have fun? didja catch it? K good. Glad we’re on the same communicatory (I know whatthefuck I said) level.

Moral is. Don’t be shitty. Shitty people make me wanna be mean. and while I’m pretty good at being mean, it’s not my favorite.
Until, you know, whenever,

Cheers, beautiful people,
TOSWG

Fuck your bad vibes, bro

 

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Untitled Blah (Episode I)

Never in the history of calming down has anyone EVER calmed down, after being told too calm down.
Never.
Gotta be honest, this post was gonna be another “hey look I’m freakingthefuck out right now and I want you guys to know about it so that I feel like I’m not alone in my misery…”
…kinda thing
But naw, fuck that, I’m so sick of depressing shit, there’s too much of it going around. So there. That’s that. And I don’t wanna bitch about the state of the world either. Although recently I have wished, on more than one occasion, that the internet was not a thing (he says as he continues to type on his personal platform he specifically refers to as “his corner of the interwebs”)
I get it. Whatever.
Now that we’ve gotten THAT outta the way let’s rant about something sexier. Because, dammit 100 percent of what I write is supposed to elicit (not “illicit” by the way TOTALLY had to look that one up. shut up.)

So, this one time, on the internet, I wrote a rant about being an asshole and about how I know for a fact that I am one. A lotta people I tell that to don’t like that I say that about myself. It’s ok, I’m thankful for your consideration, HOWEVER, it’s true. But lemme put it in perspective.

Have you ever met that douchebag who has his own fuckin’ pity party to the tune of “ooohh weellll I don’t understand, I mean, I’m such a nice guy. I love girls, they just don’t like me.”

uuuugggggggghhhhhhh shut. the. fuck. up.
These are the same mutherfuckers sending unsolicited dick pics cuz they think THAT’s any better.
Any and Every dude, who proclaims publicly that he’s a “nice guy” usually ends up getting kicked out of the bar because he’s the creepiest of mutherfuckers.
Dudes, STOP BEING NICE.
Be GENTLEMEN INSTEAD.
You see the thing about a gentleman, is that he knows, explicitly when NOT to be one.
Think about THAT. Ha!
The same concept goes for those who claim to to be “alpha.” Out of context. There’s a lot that goes into that idea that I don’t really wanna cover right now. All I can say is go look up the hashtag(#) “alphaaf” on your favorite social networking feed.
Bloodyfuckinghell I hate the internet. (says the writer as he continues blabbing in his own little corner)

I should probably stop or I’m gonna bum myself out. Just for now, anyway. Oh, no, don’t fret, I’ll come up with something else even sexier to rant about next time (is sex the only thing that sells anything…ever?) That’s boring as fuck. Oh well.

Alright, I’m over it, what were we talking about? Anything? no, no not really. I’ve been thinking, though. (I know. Dangerous. I LIVE MY LIFE ON THE FUCKIN’ EDGE)…
outbursts do not aid in the thought process…ummmm. Thinking…maybe…the fuck was I thinking abou–OH YEAH so I’ve been thinking about if whether I want to narrow the direction of this blog or if I want to maintain it as the stream-of-consciousness-limitless-blab-that-it-is. And the answer is!!!…

Yes, have some.
No, that’s not quite the answer. The answer was gonna be yes, but I’m not sure if the effort of researching topics or whatthefuckever would be worth it. So for all you readers out there who actually read my beautiful, snarky garbage. I salute you. You will continue to do so, and while some of it might bring certain points up for you to ponder and other…uh…of it…will make you laugh, none of it will make any sense.
HOWEVER
You will be afforded the opportunity to read everything that I write with my voice in mind and if, by some miracle you’re a completely random person who has, by alignment of the stars, swooped upon my material…I dunno…make it up. (I probably sound sexier in your head than I do in real life, I think my voice is goofy). Anyways, that’s all I have for now.
If you’d like to read stuff that I actually put effort into, check out my page on Wattpad which is like the Youtube for readers and writers. the name is KCWolfe30 (it’s my stage name,  I have a stage name now, stage names are cool) and drop me a line on there, or like tell me if my stuff that I think isn’t rubbish is, in fact, rubbish. I’ll be grateful.

Cheers, beautiful people,
TOSWG